In a marriage, couples seldom see eye to eye in every aspect of money management. Therefore, it is not surprising to hear that money problems or arguments are a leading cause of marriage breakups.

Conflicts are common

If you find that you are constantly fighting or having arguments about money with your spouse, do not worry as a lot of other marriages are also facing the same situation. Each partner brings different money beliefs and money management styles into the marriage relationship. When the difference is so big, the couple end up fighting as each tends to stick to his or her beliefs. Each person also has different money habits, for example one partner likes to spend money with no thought of future savings whereas the other partner hates to spend hard earned money. This is a good example of a money conflict in a marriage where one partner prefers instant gratification and the other delayed gratification.

Reasons for the differences

There are various factors that influence a person's perception on money matters. Each person is unique taking into consideration the family background, the growing up environment, the upbringing style, the educational background, etc. A person who has never been educated or even read about financial matters cannot be expected to automatically know about wealth creation or preservation.


Successful married couples should be familiar with this word, “compromise.” Couples learn to negotiate and to reach a decision where it is a win-win situation for both partners. For example, let's take Mr. and Mrs. X. Mr. X currently has his eye on an expensive digital camera and would have bought it immediately if it were not for Mrs. X disapproval. They eventually reach a compromise where Mr. X is supposed to set aside a certain amount of money each month whereby he would have the sufficient funds to buy the camera after five months. Mr. X ended up buying a different brand of camera at a cheaper price but with the same satisfactory performance. During the five months, Mr. X had spent more time surveying the different types and brand of camera available in the market. So, Mr. X got his camera and Mrs. X is happy on the money saved.

What money arguments do you normally encounter in your marriage? How do you solve the money problems with your spouse?

Jacquelyn Wong is a regular contributor at Visit her marriage website at for more marriage or relationship saving ideas.

    1 Response to "Money Conflicts in a Marriage (Part I)"

    • Lindsay

      I think that communication is equally as important as compromise. Sometimes sitting down to have the big, money discussion is just as difficult as reasoning together. The very first step should be to initiate a calm conversation with regard to finances. Honey, I know you had a long day today, but would you mind sitting down with me for a few minutes this evening to go over some figures? Id really like your help. I statements are important in alleviating defenses. Avoid the use of you.

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